It’s JULY?!?

I know… I’ve been the worst blogger ever lately! I wrote once in June and sporadically in May, and I have a feeling July might be looking about the same. Here’s why:

* I have my Arabic Final July 13th…. and I’m a bit stressed and overwhelmed about it.

* I have to renew my visa at the end of the month, which has already caused me some headaches and trips to immigration.

* I’m trying to plan and put together a VBS outreach for the month of August. By myself. In Hebrew. Enough said.

Hopefully when I make it through this month I’ll have lots of good reports to write about….. stay tuned

Fitting in

Fitting in.

Most people relate “fitting in” to the teen-age or middle-school-age years when finding your crowd can come with many challenges. Being a former middle-school teacher, I’ve seen my fare share of kids trying to change and be someone they’re not in order to fit in with a group they want to be in. Not a fun time!

Fortunately, I never really struggled with the “fitting in” issue in school (not that I didn’t have other issues) but that wasn’t one of them.

Unfortunately, I struggle with it more now, as an adult.

It’s not for a lack of friends, cuz to be honest I have some GREAT ones! It’s also not for a lack of wanting to be in a group that I’m not in either…. the truth is: many times I just have a difficult time relating to others.

Living around the world in various cultures is a tremendous calling, but it’s also changed me beyond words.  Each new place has impacted me in new ways and changed my outlook and actions toward life, as well as changing me on the inside.  I’ve taken treasures from each culture, which translates into me becoming a “melting pot” of sorts.

While all this is wonderful and great, here’s the problem… I never 100% fit in.

When I go home to The States, I find it difficult to relate to others, as the “American” in me has dwindled down to less and less over the years.  Sure, I still love my country and the Detroit Red Wings (had to get that one in, Joseph) but there’s only so far you can go with these topics.

I could give examples from each place: Brazil, Africa, Israel… but it boils down to this… I rarely feel like I really fit in anywhere, and sometimes it’s a lonely, difficult cross to bare.

Although there probably aren’t too many people here on earth who truly understand me, I KNOW there is someone up there who does! And Someday…. well, it’s one place I know I’ll fit in

I’m here.

To say that I’ve been frustrated and stressed lately is an understatement. There are moments when I just want to give up… to forget about Hebrew and Arabic… to try to find another way… but I know this is not an option for me right now.

For some reason it’s really been building up, and I’ve been so overwhelmed with it all.  Over our 2 week Pesach break, I was able to relax and devote all my extra time with ministry, which probably made my recent distaste for language studying escalate even more.

I’ve found in my life that when I’m discouraged and frustrated God has a way of putting little bits and pieces of comfort in my path.  

Today in Hebrew class we were discussing the idea of learning languages at a young age.  Our teacher then asked us how many years each of us have been learning Hebrew, to which I was a bit shocked at the answers.

I have been studying Hebrew for 2 years now… 2 LONG years; but out of everyone in my class I’ve been studying Hebrew the least amount of years. There are kids in my class who have been studying 4-10 years, and many of them have grown up in Jewish families, hearing Hebrew spoken all their lives.

I had a similar experience in Arabic class yesterday.  One of the girls in my class told me she’s been studying Arabic for 5 years now! 5 years! Me??? One.

As I sat there listening to the numbers I just thought, “What the heck am I doing in these classes with these groups?  No wonder I’m beyond stressed and mentally exhausted every night. No wonder why my mother is sick of hearing my cries every weekend…”

And then I thought of it in a new light.  Here I am, sitting in class, at the same level as these kids who have been around Hebrew their entire lives. Here I am sitting in Arabic class, reading and writing text, and just a year ago I couldn’t even recognize letters.  I might not get the highest grades on my tests or read at the same fluency as others, but I’M HERE!

I made it this far, so I might as well suck it up and keep on trekking.

Yes, I’m still frustrated…

Yes, I’m still stressed…

Yes, I’m still mentally exhausted……..

But, I’m Here!  And just that is encouragement for me today.

** Could you just say a little prayer for me this week (well, month for that matter)??? I’m really needing them! Thanks, bloggy friends!!!

Back to Work

As you can see from my previous post, last week was a week off for me. The week was filled with leisurely travel, relaxation, and celebration…. but as we know, all good things must come to an end, and such is the tale of my week vacation.

If it’s back to work I must go, then this was a perfect way to go back:

First, a field trip to the Biblical Zoo in Jerusalem with some of my refugee kids.  It might not exactly sound like work to you, but trust me…. a zoo filled with hundreds of crazy kids running around from animal to animal can drive you to the point where you’re ready to jump in with the lion and take your chances! (but we did have lots of fun too!)

Second, an afternoon in the park playing basketball.  I was finally able to hook up with one of our Professional Basketball Players in the Israeli league (we’ve been trying to put something together for a while now), where he could come down and play with the kids.  It was a huge success, and the kids absolutely LOVED him! The weather is finally nice enough again where we can resume our basketball outreach, and I honestly forgot how much I really do enjoy spending this time with the kids.

Overall, not too shabby for my first two days back after holiday! 

I’ve posted all the pictures from the Zoo field trip and our Afternoon of Basketball on our Shine Facebook Page…go check them out!

Birthday Bliss

This past weekend I turned 36 (though if anyone asks me, I’m still 35!)

I was so blessed to have some wonderful moments:

A friend gave me a full-day at a spa up in Tiberias, right on the Sea of Galilee…. fantastic!

Cotton Candy on the Boardwalk

My annual picture with the T-Rex!

VIP Movie Night at Cinema City… I don’t think I can watch a movie in the “regular” section ever again! LOL

Dead Sea and Ein Gedi to top off the weekend! 

I finally found it…

For  a while now I’ve been on the lookout for something that’s been missing from my apartment. It’s a bit ironic that my apartment is lacking this particular item, since my landlord is an Orthodox Jew, but needless to say it’s been absent….

I’m talking about a mezuzah!

When I first moved to Israel, I blogged about my first experience with the mezuzah, and since then I have always had one wherever I lived…. except now.

Yesterday I headed over to Jerusalem to spend some time with my home church Pastor and his wife, who were here on a tour, and believe it or not I FINALLY found a mezuzah in the Old City that I really liked!

I decided to hang it on the doorpost of my bedroom instead of on the outside of my apartment (just to be on the safe side), but after I hung it I realized it was the perfect place for it.

I’m super happy with my new addition!

It’s not about you.

I had a bit of a wake up call last night.

I was watching Secret Millionaire online (if you haven’t seen it, it’s a great show… cried through most of it) when the call came. It was from HIM.

You see…. I’ve been frustrated. Being called to missions in a foreign place isn’t always a cup of tea, but sometimes we add our own problems and issues on top of that.  I’ve been trying to set up a “presence” for Shine to build up supporters.  Facebook. Twitter. Blog. etc etc etc.

And I guess if I’m going to be honest, I’ve been disappointed.  Not only disappointed in the lack of response, but disappointed in myself. I’ve been caught up with the newsletters, support, finances, updates… things that we think we need to focus on; but really they should only be add-on’s to our mission.

But it wasn’t until last night that I realized what I was doing.  The “secret millionaire” went undercover to volunteer with non-profits to see where the real need was, and surprised them in the end with a huge check.  It wasn’t the huge check that got my attention, it was the org’s.  All of them were small, and unknown (except within their community).  They weren’t worried about who knew what they were doing or what publicity they were receiving…. they were concerned about the people they were helping.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks.

It’s not about me. It’s not about you. It’s about them.

And while I adore all of you, I won’t be trying to gain your praises any time soon.  I’m re-focusing my attention on them…. (and I’m still hoping one day you’ll join me)

What if?!?

I was looking at some pictures from a trip to Arizona a friend had recently took; and as I was scrolling through them, I briefly thought,

What if?

It wasn’t a “what if” that makes you long for the past or wish things would have turned out different, it was just a simple-let-my-mind-wander-to-the-scenario of, “what if“.

Growing up in Michigan, I always aspired to go somewhere warmer.  I knew I didn’t want to stay in Michigan for college, so I began looking at possibilites. I chose Arizona State University.

While I was there, I honestly thought I would spend the rest of my life in Scottsdale.  Get married. Have a cute little family. Live in North Scottsdale in the school district where I was teaching.

But God had other plans. BIGGER plans. BETTER plans.

My “what if” scenario looked very different than what my real life has become…and I honestly couldn’t even imagine my life if my “what if” had turned out to have been my “what is“.

No, I’m not married. No, I don’t have a cute little family. No, I’m not teaching anymore.

BUT, I have Brasil. I have Africa. I have Israel. I have all the people in my life that I would have never known and loved had I never left Scottsdale.

And in a strange way, I DID end up living in the desert…. just on the other side of the world.

What if?!?

Who would’ve thunk it?!?

Since I moved down to the “Central Bus Station” area, everyone always asks me if I feel safe there…. to which I usually reply, “I haven’t had any problems.” I’ve been told to be careful because of all the “Africans” living there and all the violence they cause. But as I said before, “I haven’t had any problems……..

UNTIL TODAY

…… and it wasn’t caused by the refugees.

As I got off the bus this morning, I was suddenly caught in an unexpected downpour.  I had no umbrella or protection, so I stood under a building to attempt to wait it out.  It didn’t quite work as planned.

About 5 minutes into waiting, one of the drugged-out prostitues (who was walking down the middle of the street, oblivious to the rain) approached me in the nook of my shelter.  She started rambling on about this and that and nothing she said made any sense.  She did manage to ask me why I was standing there and I told her because of the rain. She didn’t quite get it.

What happened next was pretty crazy, but considering her state of mind, probably not so much in her world.  She grabbed my arm like she wanted me to go with her.  I told her no, that I was staying there and she got furious. She started screaming at me (in jibberish) which was getting on my nerves, so I decided to just brave the rain and make a run for it.

When I went to leave she grabbed my hair and yanked me back. (Literally I flew back, and luckily I didn’t fall).  I  turned around and told her to stop. At that very moment a guy who was across the street ran over and pulled her away from me.  He told me to just go…. so I did.

I heard her start to yell at him, but he was much bigger than both of us, so I’m pretty sure it didn’t fase him at all.

As I ran the rest of the way home, I thought to myself, “Everyone is always worried that I’ll be attacked by some drunk guy down here, yet it ends up being a high prostitute.” Who would’ve thunk it?!?

Well, certainly not me! (though after volunteering at the shelter, I should have imagined it: those girls are intensely violent.)

I’ll admit that I was a bit shaken up when I finally got home, and I just kept thinking, “what if that guy hadn’t come? what would I have had to do if she didn’t leave me alone?”

Thankfully, I didn’t have to find out, and I really hope that I don’t either. What a morning!

2 1/2 More Weeks!

Only 2 1/2 weeks until Christmas?!?

THANK YOU GOD!

These past couple weeks have been BRUTAL on me, and quite frankly, I’m ever-so-happy to see them behind me!  I’ve been baking and hosting like crazy, and this past weekend was our big Help Portrait Tel Aviv Event.  All this to say that I’m ready for you, Christmas even if you aren’t showing yourself anywhere in my world!

Help Portrait Tel Aviv 2010

~~CLICK HERE TO SEE THE FULL COLLECTION~~

 

Candy Cane Christmas Cookies

 

My Christmakkah

Saying Goodbye

Yesterday morning I lost my little Falafel.  She wasn’t doing so well for the last couple of weeks, and it was breaking my heart, seeing her suffering; but I was hoping she would re-cooperate.  I woke up to see my little sweetheart take her last breaths.

She is the third animal I’ve lost this year, and I just don’t think my ❤ can take much more right now.

In memory of her better moments:

a LITTLE piece of FALL.

Honestly, besides my family and friends, there really isn’t TOO much I miss about the States.   Sure, there are things here and there, but overall not a lot…… EXCEPT FOR FALL!

I love everything about FALL.  Colors of leaves. College Football. Brisk weather (but not too cold). Hoodies. And most of all PUMPKINS!

Pumpkin Spiced Lattes, Pumpkin bread, Pumpkin Seeds, Carving Pumpkins, Pumpkin Candy Corns…… everything Pumpkin!

Living in the desert doesn’t exactly spell success for all things Pumpkin, especially when its still in the high 80′s/low 90′s…. so you can imagine my bliss when I received a package in the mail from my friend, Crystal, containing Pumpkin Goodies!!!

Pumpkin Syrup from Caribou Coffee, Pumpkin Pie Spice, Pumpkin Bread Mix from Pillsbury, and not to mention Coffee Beans as well!  The GREAT PUMPKIN STRIKES AGAIN!!!

Signs, signs, everywhere signs.

This past weekend I did something I haven’t done in FOREVER!  At 6pm on Saturday night a friend and I decided to take an impromptu road trip to…. well, we didn’t have a destination in mind…. to anywhere I guess.  We grabbed some essentials: Israel map, toilet paper, snacks, water, OFF spray, torch, etc. and hit the road!  We decided to head south and see where the roads would take us.

The concept began as a Night Road Trip, but turned into an ALL-Night one with a Morning tacked on as well.  We ended up traveling the entire south of Israel, down the west and back up the east.  We had an exhausting, yet fun night and it was something that I NEEDED so much!  Just getting out of the city and satisfying my road-bug craving made my ❤ sing.

I took lots of pics, but my favorites ended up being crazy signs you see along the roads of Israel.  Here are a few of my favorites, just in case you end up driving in my country anytime soon:

And finally, after a looooong night filled with signs, we headed back home to Tel Aviv, making a quick stop in Jerusalem:

THEN HEADED STRAIGHT TO BED!!!

It’s Sukkot Time Again

This month has been one big holiday… first Rosh HaShana then Yom Kippur, and now Sukkot.  Last year at this time I was in my old apartment in Ramat Gan, and my flat-mate turned our varanda into a beautiful Sukkah.  This year I have no varanda, so I wasn’t really going to do anything for Sukkot until inspiration struck early this morning.

The sukkah is a temporary dwelling of remembrance (click here to read last years post explaining the meaning and origin of this Jewish Holiday); therefore, I’m making my temporary dwelling in my living room….

Mine is far from professional, but if you’re interested in one that is, take a fast forward look into building an outside sukkah:

Chag Semeach Everyone!!! חג סוכות שמח!

Yom Kippur: The Day of Atonement and Bicycles

Tel Aviv. Not exactly the ‘holy city’ like Jerusalem and not exactly the quiet atmosphere of the Galilee…. but every city in all of Israel comes together for this day.

No public transportation. No personal vehicles allowed on any street.  No stores or businesses open…. nothing but a day of country-wide fasting…. and bike riding.

It’s traditional on Yom Kippur, because of the no-car rule, for everyone to ride their bicycles in the streets.  Here are a couple pics down on the beach road of good ol’ Tel Aviv.  I will admit it was kinda cool walking down the middle of the road with everyone else, not having to worry about traffic!