Fitting in

Fitting in.

Most people relate “fitting in” to the teen-age or middle-school-age years when finding your crowd can come with many challenges. Being a former middle-school teacher, I’ve seen my fare share of kids trying to change and be someone they’re not in order to fit in with a group they want to be in. Not a fun time!

Fortunately, I never really struggled with the “fitting in” issue in school (not that I didn’t have other issues) but that wasn’t one of them.

Unfortunately, I struggle with it more now, as an adult.

It’s not for a lack of friends, cuz to be honest I have some GREAT ones! It’s also not for a lack of wanting to be in a group that I’m not in either…. the truth is: many times I just have a difficult time relating to others.

Living around the world in various cultures is a tremendous calling, but it’s also changed me beyond words.  Each new place has impacted me in new ways and changed my outlook and actions toward life, as well as changing me on the inside.  I’ve taken treasures from each culture, which translates into me becoming a “melting pot” of sorts.

While all this is wonderful and great, here’s the problem… I never 100% fit in.

When I go home to The States, I find it difficult to relate to others, as the “American” in me has dwindled down to less and less over the years.  Sure, I still love my country and the Detroit Red Wings (had to get that one in, Joseph) but there’s only so far you can go with these topics.

I could give examples from each place: Brazil, Africa, Israel… but it boils down to this… I rarely feel like I really fit in anywhere, and sometimes it’s a lonely, difficult cross to bare.

Although there probably aren’t too many people here on earth who truly understand me, I KNOW there is someone up there who does! And Someday…. well, it’s one place I know I’ll fit in 🙂

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About Maureen Hochdorf

Writer. Editor. High Techi. Non-Profit Founder. Traveler. Sports Lover. Star Wars Fanatic. Tel Aviver. Michigander.... View all posts by Maureen Hochdorf

7 responses to “Fitting in

  • Mom

    “This world is not my home, I just a-traveling through. My treasures are laid up, some where beyond the blue.” (the next lines of the song aren’t coming to me. been quite some time since that one has been heard or sung!)
    Oh it just came to me-
    “The angels becken me from heavens open door and I can’t feel at home in this world anymore”.
    Unfortunately, too many of us get too comfortable in this world instead of “setting our affection on things above, not on things on this world”.

  • moweezle

    I love you mom, your comments always make my heart smile 🙂

  • @ngie

    I totally understand what you are saying. And the people with whom we do ‘fit in’ have that ONE thing in common: we are the odd ball out. So even when we get together the one thing we have in common to discuss is that we surround ourselves with the foreign.

  • Joseph DuLaney

    Okay, you just had to throw a Wings dig in there didn’t ya? You guys aren’t out of the fire yet sista!

    That being said, I am not sure any of us really always relates to others or 100% comfortable. I do think the ones who do best at this are those who embrace what is unique about them and celebrate it. After all, when you celebrate your uniqueness, your passion comes through. And no matter how difficult it is to relate with others, Passion trumps and the group accepts.

    I personally fight with this as well. I am confident. I am passionate. I share my opinion. However, I also love to hear about others so even though I am not 100% comfortable in many groups, I tend to make my way. This is especially true when it comes to Bible studies….oh boy do I struggle there.

    So, now that probably none of this makes sense I will stop with this.

    Share your experience with Passion. The rest will take care of itself. If you don’t fit in then, wrong group. (PS…this would be Red Wings Fans..bad group. Preds fans would welcome you 🙂 )

  • Lexi MacKinnon

    Absolutely love that last point… such a comfort to me on this journey!

    “Although there probably aren’t too many people here on earth who truly understand me, I KNOW there is someone up there who does! And Someday…. well, it’s one place I know I’ll fit in.”

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