To say that I’ve been frustrated and stressed lately is an understatement. There are moments when I just want to give up… to forget about Hebrew and Arabic… to try to find another way… but I know this is not an option for me right now.
For some reason it’s really been building up, and I’ve been so overwhelmed with it all. Over our 2 week Pesach break, I was able to relax and devote all my extra time with ministry, which probably made my recent distaste for language studying escalate even more.
I’ve found in my life that when I’m discouraged and frustrated God has a way of putting little bits and pieces of comfort in my path.
Today in Hebrew class we were discussing the idea of learning languages at a young age. Our teacher then asked us how many years each of us have been learning Hebrew, to which I was a bit shocked at the answers.
I have been studying Hebrew for 2 years now… 2 LONG years; but out of everyone in my class I’ve been studying Hebrew the least amount of years. There are kids in my class who have been studying 4-10 years, and many of them have grown up in Jewish families, hearing Hebrew spoken all their lives.
I had a similar experience in Arabic class yesterday. One of the girls in my class told me she’s been studying Arabic for 5 years now! 5 years! Me??? One.
As I sat there listening to the numbers I just thought, “What the heck am I doing in these classes with these groups? No wonder I’m beyond stressed and mentally exhausted every night. No wonder why my mother is sick of hearing my cries every weekend…”
And then I thought of it in a new light. Here I am, sitting in class, at the same level as these kids who have been around Hebrew their entire lives. Here I am sitting in Arabic class, reading and writing text, and just a year ago I couldn’t even recognize letters. I might not get the highest grades on my tests or read at the same fluency as others, but I’M HERE!
I made it this far, so I might as well suck it up and keep on trekking.
Yes, I’m still frustrated…
Yes, I’m still stressed…
Yes, I’m still mentally exhausted……..
But, I’m Here! And just that is encouragement for me today.
** Could you just say a little prayer for me this week (well, month for that matter)??? I’m really needing them! Thanks, bloggy friends!!!