Tag Archives: Faith

It’s not about you.

I had a bit of a wake up call last night.

I was watching Secret Millionaire online (if you haven’t seen it, it’s a great show… cried through most of it) when the call came. It was from HIM.

You see…. I’ve been frustrated. Being called to missions in a foreign place isn’t always a cup of tea, but sometimes we add our own problems and issues on top of that.  I’ve been trying to set up a “presence” for Shine to build up supporters.  Facebook. Twitter. Blog. etc etc etc.

And I guess if I’m going to be honest, I’ve been disappointed.  Not only disappointed in the lack of response, but disappointed in myself. I’ve been caught up with the newsletters, support, finances, updates… things that we think we need to focus on; but really they should only be add-on’s to our mission.

But it wasn’t until last night that I realized what I was doing.  The “secret millionaire” went undercover to volunteer with non-profits to see where the real need was, and surprised them in the end with a huge check.  It wasn’t the huge check that got my attention, it was the org’s.  All of them were small, and unknown (except within their community).  They weren’t worried about who knew what they were doing or what publicity they were receiving…. they were concerned about the people they were helping.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks.

It’s not about me. It’s not about you. It’s about them.

And while I adore all of you, I won’t be trying to gain your praises any time soon.  I’m re-focusing my attention on them…. (and I’m still hoping one day you’ll join me) 🙂


Are You Out There?

We’re inundated with it since childhood, the concept of true love.

Snow White sings, “Someday my Prince will come”…

Cinderella is rescued by her Prince Charming and lives happily ever after….

Even Sleeping beauty’s Prince appears from her dream world into reality to wake her…

And we wonder why as little girls we grow up with the concept of finding our one true love.

The truth is that I think I used to believe in it too.  Its been so long, and I will admit that after broken relationships I’ve become a little jaded about the concept of “one true love”.  At this point I’m just wondering if there is even someone compatible out there for me.

I’ve been told endless times that God has the perfect one for me, and as much as I want to believe it, the truth is that I just don’t know if I do.  Maybe my faith is running low.  Maybe doubts have taken over.  Maybe I’ve lived in the fallen world too long…or maybe its all three.  I struggle with that statement everyday that passes.

So, I will end this post with the question I proposed in the title:

Are You Out There?


Depending Fully on HIM???

Today I am going to write about a serious topic, one that directly affects my own life.

PERSONAL SAFETY.

How far would you go in order to feel safe?  How far is too far?  What is acceptable and what is not?

I do ministry in the darkest, most dangerous area in Tel Aviv; yet I have never felt unsafe while I was there.  Mind you, I am usually there during the day, but now that winter is approaching and it’s getting dark earlier, I will be finishing at night.

I have been told by some that I need to carry protection with me…..pepper spray, stun-devices, or even a gun. (As a disclaimer, I DID have a gun while I lived in Africa.  Technically it was a  gun for animals, but he could have easily done a bit of damage on a person as well. I also wouldn’t even be ALLOWED to carry a gun here.)

I am constantly being reminded of how “it’s not safe for you to be there” or “you shouldn’t be there at all at night“.

I’m not saying that this information is not true. I am NOT going to run out and get a gun….by no means, and no, it is NOT safe there at night; but it does bring up an interesting thought. As a believer in God and His protection on my life, do I forgo any other means of protection and depend fully on Him?

And there it is: DEPEND FULLY ON HIM!!!

Sometimes this is extremely difficult to do, especially when you are faced with having outside options.

But what about using those options as “back-up” just in case??? (These are words that are swirling all around me…not just from others, but from my own head too.

Its easy to say to someone: Depend fully on Him.  But when reality hits you in the face as you literally “walk through the valley of the shadow of death” each night coming home, its a tad more challenging.

So please give me your opinion.  I’m struggling a bit in this area, and my doubts come not from fear, but from advisement on what I should do.  I want to be full of faith in my Father, and at the same time I also want to be full of wisdom as well. What do you think???


Hope + Expectations = Vison

This formula has been stewing around in my mind, thanks to a series called Marked by Hope, by my home church pastor, P. Lee.  I have been watching the podcasts of the series, which is excellent by the way.  

I will admit….I have always had huge vision and great expectations.  Lately though, its my hope that has been lacking. Reality kicks in, and slowly my hope has been dwindling.  Its super hard living here, and things don’t happen as quickly or easily as I had hoped for.  Doubt and fear seep in and chew away at that chunk of hope that was once full inside of me.

My vision is still there, and I still have expectations; but without hope the formula will not be fulfilled to its FULLEST! They all work together.  They all need each other.

Getting that hope back can be difficult.  The fact that we should be overflowing in hope, is something that I know I haven’t been visibly showing every day.  BUT, there is one thing that I am reminded of, which is helping me to restore that hope I once had: I am SEALED with ALL of His promises!!!  This includes the promise of hope and a future.  This is what I am holding onto, today and tomorrow, and forever.

(Thanks, P. Lee for the kick of inspiration)


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